Today In SkyNet: Google’s AlphaGo Beat China’s Top ‘Go’ Player.

Serious question: WHY DO WE KEEP DOING THIS?

I don’t know what ‘Go’ is, but one quick Wiki search tells me that it’s some old Chinese game, dating back to when Matt Damon and Oberyn Tyrell were forced to ban together and fight off dragons and whatever else was in that shitty movie ‘The Great Wall’. The point is, this game was not meant to be played by computers.

I don’t want to come across as speciesist but God made Adam & Eve, not Adam & HAL 9000. It’s bad enough that computers are already taking our jobs but now they want to take away our sources of entertainment? Well not on my watch! Computers are suppose to be as smart as the people who programmed them, not any smarter, that’s how we get the Terminator.

Just think about it, in less then 30 years, computers have mastered chess AND Go. In my 22 years on this planet, I’ve hardly learned how to hit the toilet while taking a piss, let alone master a game.

This also means that our computers have the free time to learn how to master all our games which if you ask me, makes computers seem pretty damn lazy. How bout instead of learning the intricacies of a 1000 year old game, you solve world hunger, you selfish fucks.

If I’m the family of Ke Jie I’m putting him on suicide watch.

go sad

Just look at this man, that’s the face of the most defeated man on the planet. Could you imagine, wasting all those years of your life to learn some stupid game, only to have all your life’s work destroyed by those nerds over at google. Gotta be a weird feeling for a Chinese guy to have his job rendered obsolete by technology. You expect that in the rust belt, but China? Sad!

Side Note: If we can develop AI that has the possibility to beat people in a game like Go, where I’ll assume this person is at least 100x smarter then I am, why the hell can’t we develop up-field blocking AI in Madden? I don’t wanna tell the computer people how to do their jobs, but how about we focus on giving smarter AI to a game people actually play.


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