Venus Williams Killed An Old Person Over The Weekend

Well at least we can finally put an end to the debate on whether or not Venus Williams could kill more people then someone on the male circuit. Venus killed the man driving at the erratic speed of 5mph. Luckily for us all more people weren't killed but then again, Venus is powerless without her … Continue reading Venus Williams Killed An Old Person Over The Weekend

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Crow Attacks Have Become So Vicious, Vancouver Has Halted Their Mail Service

Folks,,,, we are at def con 1 when it comes to these motherfucking crows. It was one thing when there was the odd flyby attack, but once you start shutting down government jobs, you know we have a problem. I would go as far as to say as these crows should be classified as terrorists. … Continue reading Crow Attacks Have Become So Vicious, Vancouver Has Halted Their Mail Service

Timothy Richard Tebow III Went Yard In His First Single-A At Bat

TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWW Live look at me after watching the Messiah go yard at his first at bat The haters and losers said that this was just a publicity stunt but as the centurion remarked in Matthew 27:54 "Truly this was the son of god". No matter how many times people try to tell Tebow that he'll … Continue reading Timothy Richard Tebow III Went Yard In His First Single-A At Bat

The Los Angeles Clippers Have Traded Chris Paul To The Houston Rockets

Live look at NBA off-season If there's one thing the NBA is great at, it's giving us some of the most wild off-season transactions. Just hours after the Knicks decided to part ways with Phil Jackson, the Rockets announced that they have acquired PG Chris Paul from the LA Clippers in return for PG Patrick … Continue reading The Los Angeles Clippers Have Traded Chris Paul To The Houston Rockets

FIFA Didn’t Follow Concussion Protocol At The Last World Cup, And I For One Am Shocked!

My lord! You're telling me the organization that has turned a blind eye to slave labour ┬ádidn't follow it's own concussion protocol? Well colour me shocked! I wasn't aware that concussions were an issue in soccer but here we are. I guess diving is a leading cause of CTE. I like to think that this … Continue reading FIFA Didn’t Follow Concussion Protocol At The Last World Cup, And I For One Am Shocked!

Phil Jackson Has Been Fired By The New York Knickerbockers

Well it's about goddamn time. The most overrated person in basketball history has officially been canned. I don't know what took so long for the Knicks to fire Phil, but I'll assume it was because James Dolan was too focused on releasing his album. Phil Jackson has tried his best to get fired pretty much … Continue reading Phil Jackson Has Been Fired By The New York Knickerbockers

An Official Got Impaled By A Javelin At A Qualifying Trial For The Canada Summer Games

When I first saw this headline, I thought one of the participants got impaled and I was going to say that it serves them right for taking up such a stupid sport but then I saw it was an official and the questioned popped into my head, "how shitty does your life have to be … Continue reading An Official Got Impaled By A Javelin At A Qualifying Trial For The Canada Summer Games