Pudding Pop Salesman Granted Mistrial In Rape Case

cosby

Who would’ve guessed that selling pudding pops and wearing sweater vests was all it took to beat a couple dozen sexual assault allegations. Baylor Football could learn a thing or two from Bill Cosby, the next time a rape charge comes their way, because trust me, there will be a next time.

I would’ve loved to be fly in the room as the jury tried to come to their decision. “He definitely drugged and raped these women buttttttt have you guys ever seen ‘kids’ say the darnedest things’?”

The worst part about all this (besides the 50+ rapes) is that Bill Cosby isn’t and has never been funny. I honestly have no clue how this guy became famous. Cosby is like the black Gallagher if you asked me, but everyone fucking loves or loved Bill Cosby.

When Michael Jackson was getting accused of diddling little boys, at least he had dropped songs like ‘Thriller’ and ‘Billie Jean’, those songs were certified fuego and probably gave MJ 1-2 free passes when it came to diddling kids. Cosby on the other hand might as well be Jared from Subway. The guy sold pudding pops and made shitty jokes for gods sake, stop treating him life he’s comedy royalty.

I mean Fat Albert gets Cosby out of a DUI and the Cosby show might be good enough for one murder, maybe 2, but in no way has Cosby done enough greatness in his life to warrant getting off on these charges. Jesus didn’t even do enough good deeds in his lifetime to get away with 50+ rapes, so whoever is on this jury needs to be forced to spend the rest of their lives with Bill Cosby until he dies. Let’s see if there opinions change once the pudding pop tries to roofy their drinks for the 1000th time.

At least since it was a mistrial, Cosby isn’t out of the woodwork yet but I wouldn’t hold my breath when it comes to this guy getting a guilty verdict. On the plus side, Cosby’s time on this earth has to be limited, so while his victims may never get the justice they deserve. At least they can dance on his grave in a year or so.

Pudding Pops for everyone!

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