Workers At The LCBO Are Threatening To Go On Strike Ahead of Canada Day

FOLKS,,,! We are def-con 2 in the liquor department! While the rest of the world is focused on how to stop the next terrorist attack, Ontario is facing a terror situation of it’s own as workers at the LCBO are threatening to go on strike. Now look, I haven’t dug into the details of why they’re going on strike but I’ll assume it’s because they’re sick and tired of being spit on by homeless people and while I too would hate that, it doesn’t mean I’d go and take the whole province hostage.

Because make no mistake, that’s exactly what they’re doing. There’s only one place that people can buy liquor and the employees of the LCBO know just that. They know that no matter the case, people are going to join their side because at the end of the day, we all just wanna drink our liquor in peace.

The only question for me is, who do we charge as a traitor? Canada is turning 150 in less then 2 weeks and I’ll be damned if I can’t drink a fine bottle of whiskey on her birthday. John A McDonald didn’t run our country for two terms drunk as shit, just for the LCBO to go on strike.

The worst part of all this, is that this is only a Canadian issue. Every other country sells booze in corner and grocery stores but not Canada. For some reason, a country that prides itself on alcohol, has completely monopolized the liquor market, despite laws that stop businesses frpm doing just that. I don’t know about you, but I didn’t vote for the LCBO to have absolute power. So clearly the LCBO has become Frankenstein’s monster. They’ve realized the power that they posses and are now unleashing their wrath on Canadians.

If this strike does end up happening, I would recommend keeping a safe 10 paces between you and the nearest homeless person. As I’ve said countless times on this site, the homeless have been extra ornery as of late and if they can’t buy booze, I wouldn’t be shocked to see crime rates rise tenfold.

P.S. Didn’t the LCBO threaten to go on strike a couple years back before another major holiday? Stay woke, but this may be a marketing ploy.

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