It Is Time To Build The Wall

Anybody whose read this site or NorthRowSports (R.I.P) knows that I’ve been very adamant about building a border wall between us and the United States, sure it might hurt our relations but the last time I checked, Mongolian-Chinese relations have never been better since the construction of their “great” wall.

It’s time to face facts, our former friend to the South has really begun to lose their shit. I mean, we got their leader tweeting like a teenage girl. They keep trying to pick a fight with a country that has never even won a war and if we’re being honest, they’ve really let their figure go. Don’t get me wrong, I’m body positive but someone has to let them know that they’ve started packing on the lbs, but that’s beside the point.

The real issue at hand is the safety and protection of this country. I recently watched the documentary ‘Oklahoma’ (highly recommend) and at the end of the movie it showed where all these alt-right Nazi groups have been popping up. Think the end of ‘Spotlight’, just instead of showing every priest and church that diddled a kid, they showed where a bunch of guys who thought Hitler was actually the good guy in World War 2 are currently popping up. And where are they popping up? Glad you asked. RIGHT BY THE FUCKING BORDER! Michigan, Wyoming and any other state that you’d never want to visit is crawling with a bunch of yahoos who think it’s the fucking wild west and thanks to the oh so great second amendment, they’re allowed to arm themselves to the teeth like a real life Bullet Farmer.

This is why we need to commence building a wall to protect us from our violent neighbours to the South. We can’t risk having an influx of guns entering the country illegally. It’s bad enough that Toronto is trying to be Chiraq, no need to expedite the process. Not to mention think about all the jobs it would create. The U.S. and Canada share the longest border in the world that means jobs for everyone. Every province could help out, it would be like going to a tapping of ‘Oprah’ but instead of getting some gift under your seat, you get the gift of employment. Also, since the U.S. refuses to listen to my wall idea, I propose we both A) make it into a tourist attraction, pretty much paying for itself. Just think about it, you could take your family to the wall and peer over and see how much worse you could have it. And B) we lather it up with solar panels. So now do we not only have a great tourist attraction for the whole family but are also doing our part in saving the environment.

You’re welcome world!

P.S. the definitely not racists’ of Canada are saying why are we more worried about legal gun owners entering our country instead of the thousands of illegal immigrants flocking to Canada. I can’t be certain but maybe it’s because close to 7000 people alone have been killed by guns this year (excluding suicide) in the United States while illegal immigrants have only taken up space in a useless fucking stadium.

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