The day hath finally arrived, Andrew Austen* Luck will throw a football in a meaningful game. OK not really a meaningful game since it’s just the Colts first preseason game but this is the first time that Colts’ fans will get to see Luck throw against a real defense in like 2 years. You know your team is in a sad state of affairs when you’re starting QB is playing in the first preseason game. They don’t usually show up until the 3rd game but when you got the rust that Luck’s got, every snap counts.
I’m not too worried about Luck’s arm, if he comes out like noodle arm Manning, that’s fine because like I said, he hasn’t thrown a football since Donald Trump has taken office so he might come out a little flat. If he comes out rocketing the ball, then at least we know the surgeries worked but I’ll try my best to hide my erection because I know it’s just preseason but goddammit it’s real to me.
My biggest concern is that Luck takes a sack and everything comes crumbling apart. Yes the Colts have somewhat improved their O-line especially after drafting Notre Dame OG Quenton Nelson (who has the highest rookie rating in Madden NBD) but there are still some holes, especially with Jack Mewhort announcing his retirement just 4 years into his career. For the whole preseason Luck has to make sure to release that ball early (even if it leads to a pick) and remember there’s no need to scramble, it’s preseason, get your head straight, your mechanics in order and everything should fall into place.
The game isn’t till 10, which is past my bedtime but since he’ll probably only be playing a couple possessions, I like to see myself still asleep at nice 11pm. Young Kornheiser over here.
We’re less then a month away from football folks and I could not be more excited. Get the fuck outta here sweltering heat that turns me into a puddle of sweat and hello, getting too drunk on a Sunday and sweating from eating pizza to fast.
*HOLY FUCK I NEVER REALIZED ANDREW LUCK’S MIDDLE NAME WAS MY FIRST NAME AND SPELLED THE SAME. I ALWAYS THOT IT WAS OLIVER AFTER HIS FATHER. What a wild ride and frankly embarrassing look on my part. I know Timothy Richard Tebow III whole name and I can’t even realize my star QB shared a name with me. Sad!